I’m toast.
Man.
I got up at 3am this morning because I was amped up on Claritin-D. After a very long, unproductive day, I am ready to just pass the fuck out. But I can’t. Because Top Chef is on.
So while I wait, stoned on Benadryl and exhausted from lack of sleep, I am going to share ten random things with you. Ready? Mmmkay.
Numero Uno.
I am wearing a red and yellow batik kaftan which is so ugly, I cannot believe I even own it.
#2.
I am drinking Ginger Ale.
3.
Both my kids made the honor roll.
Four.
I wish I had a Dyson vacuum.
El Fivo.
I can’t think of anything sadder than losing a child to death. I feel so bad for John Travolta and Kelly Preston.
SIX!!!!!
I <3 Jon Stewart.
7.
I have a bag of M&M’s calling my name. Peanut.
Ocho.
One of my favorite books of all time is One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish
Niner.
I am really gassy, damn it.
((((NUMBER TEN))))
These M&M’s are kickin’.


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