1.  What possesses people to make Funny Toilets?

2.  Here is a highly amusing cartoon depiction of Heaven.

3.  I’m finally getting a Blackberry!  That means I will have access to the internets any time, any place!  Ahhhh.  What a feeling!  I’ve ordered the Curve.

4.  I am obsessed with this song right now:

5.  I’ve almost finished reading the book Chain of Command: The Road from 9/11 to Abu Ghraib by Seymour Hersh, and it is very enlightening.  It really gives you a glimpse of the inner workings of the government and military; and really clarifies some of the decisions that were made during the past 8 years.  I’ve had several “ah ha!” moments reading it. 

6.  Can you explain this?

7.  Are you following me on Twitter?

8.  Are you feeling mushy?  Go to Trees Instead and write your love story to win a $250 Amazon Gift Card and an acre of trees to dedicate to your loved one!

9.  A comfortable looking bra!

10.  Today’s QS Poll:

The other night I was surfing the internet (as is my late night custom) and I stumbled upon a website that made reference to some vague doom and gloom prophecy having to do with the election of President Barack Obama. 

Since I have an inquiring mind and never let the opportunity to get riled up over religious crap pass me by, I decided to fire up The Google.  I was shocked to find that there are actually quite a few entertaining–and conflicting–prophetic theories about our newly inaugurated leader:

This person assures us that, while Obama will have a hand in ushering in the apocalypse, he is not actually the Antichrist.  (Whew!)

Another site has an outdated prophecy about the 2008 Presidential Election and Obama's chances of winning which isn't really a prophecy as much as it is an op-ed piece.

Now THIS one is juicy.  It's from the Church of God News which tells us that the U.S. is doomed to destruction in about four years, and quotes both the bible and some Kenyan prophecy which claims that Obama is going to help bring us down.  (Here's more on the Kenyan prophecy)

THEN I found out that even Nostradamus had it out for poor Prez-O!

But what really got me going is that I found out Obama is actually the fulfillment of some ancient (yet newly discovered) MUSLIM PROPHECY!  (As a Muslim, I was naturally quite surprised to find this out.  I guess
you learn something new about your religion every day, eh?) 

Well, if you think that's exciting, you must view this video, which is literally chock full o' prophetic wisdom about Obama, Muslims, and the end of the world.

But it's not all bad!  There are some people who believe that Obama is actually fulfilling a GOOD kind of prophecy. 

This person, for example, believes he is the the fulfillment of a prophecy by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.  And the International Branch of the Lion of Judah claims that, even though Obama's election is a sign of the end of time, he's actually here to help us.

This person has revealed that Obama and Ben Franklin are both being used by Christ to help prepare us for Armageddon.

And this article claims that Barack Obama is the fulfillment of a 2,500 year old prophecy and the proof of God's Blessing on African Americans.

You know something?  I think I'm going to take up prophesying.  I'm just as qualified as anyone else, wouldn't you say?  Get ready, ya'll.  I'm feeling PROPHETIQ!

news

1.  Have you seen the Bubble Tweet?  If you've made one already, can you tweet it to me: @TheQ_Speaks?  I want to see how people are doing them.

2.  Suicide rates in the Army are the highest they have ever been since they started tracking them back in the 1980's.  This makes me sick to my stomach.  Soldiers are not in a position to question–their JOB is to follow orders.  They have placed their lives in the hands of their commanders, trusting them completely to make the best decisions, to not place them in unnecessary danger, and to use their force for the best possible reasons.  Not to exploit them and risk their lives for the sake of war profiteering. 

3.  He's so cool.

4.  I found my cell phone!  It was on my nightstand.  I'm totally serious.  It was on my goddamn night stand for three days and I couldn't find it. 

5.  Neil Diamond is the shizz.  If you don't like Neil Diamond then you are the type of person who cannot be completely trusted.  This is a scientific fact. 

6.  In honor of Neil Diamond, may I present:

7.  Today, our President signed the Pay Equity Law.  If he keeps this up, we're going to be a goddamn Utopia in four more years!

8.  The Costco $9.99 take-and-bake pizza is the best deal ever.  EVER.

9.  In honor of the Super Bowl, America, and all things processed and cheezy, I present The Greatest Snack Food Stadium Ever Built!

10.  Today's Q Speaks Poll:

1.  Owls are cool.

2.  My friend Sara Seumae is the Interesting Person of the Week.  She's the creator, designer, and all around powerhouse behind the organic clothing line SPUN.

3.  It's Top Chef night!  Who'd going to get the chop?  PLEASE don't let it be Stefan!  Actually, I'm hoping Carla makes a comeback and kicks everyone's ass.  Anytime there's a kook on the show, I'm gonna be in their corner.

4.  Why the fuck doesn't Taco Bell deliver?

5.  My kids are supposed to be making paper bag vests that they decorate with "100 Things" in honor of the 100th day of school.  They drew colorful rainbows, butterflies, cars, planets, stars, hearts–and as a finishing touch, my son added a picture of a person sitting on a toilet.  I only wish I was kidding.  The good news is, it's a pretty good picture for a six-year-old.

6.  Today's Q Speaks Poll:

7.  Gaza Body Count:  1,314 dead total.  412 Children.  Fucking disgusting.

8.  AOL News is asking if Obama is The Most Famous Living Person Ever.  Then it gives readers a poll with the following contenders for the title.  In addition to President Obama are:  The Beatles (not actually a person), Princess Diana (she has her own collectible plates,  too!), Adolf Hitler (WTF?), and Michael Jackson (*snort*).  I am not exactly sure what to think of AOL news right now.

9.  There is now a support group for socialites who's husbands are financially hurting from the bad economy.  Should I join or what?!?!

10.  I miss Helen Reddy, man.  That ain't no way to treat a lady, ya big dickhead:

Name:

SARA SEUMAE

Hometown:

MERCER ISLAND, WA (PRETTY MUCH SEATTLE)

What is your occupation?

MOM, WIFE, CLOTHING DESIGNER, BUSINESS OWNER

What professional accomplishment are you most proud of?

I STARTED SPUN WITHOUT A LICK OF KNOWLEDGE ABOUT DESIGNING OR MAKING CLOTHES. WE ARE GETTING READY TO CELEBRATE OUR ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY IN FEBRUARY AND IT’S BEEN QUITE A LEARNING EXPERIENCE.

What academic accomplishment are you most proud of?

GRADUATING HIGH SCHOOL EVENTHOUGH I HAD A REALLY “COOL” OLDER BOYFRIEND AT THE TIME AND ALWAYS SKIPPED SCHOOL TO HANG OUT WITH HIM.

What personal accomplishment are you most proud of?

MY LITTLE GIRLS AND THE ABILITY TO NOT KILL MY HUSBAND ON AN ALMOST DAILY BASIS. MEN ARE SO ANNOYING SOMETIMES!

What is your favorite word?

REALLY?!?

What is your least favorite word?

C*NT AND PANTIES.

What would you choose as your “last meal”?

ANY AND ALL PERSIAN FOOD

What’s your favorite guilty pleasure?

TOTINOS PIZZA ROLLS. THEY ARE SO BAD FOR YOU BUT SO YUMMY!

Describe your favorite pair of shoes.

BALLET FLATS AND UGG BOOTS, EQUALLY

When do you feel happiest?

WHEN I’M AT DISNEYLAND WITH MY SISTER. CHURROS IN HAND AND THERE ARE NO LINES FOR RIDES!

Name one book that changed your perception of the world.

“A SHOT IN THE DARK”. IT’S ABOUT THE WHOOPING COUGH VACCINATION AND HOW IT MAKES KIDS SICK. IT’S PRETTY MUCH ONE OF THE SCARIEST BOOKS A PARENT COULD READ.

If they made a movie of your life, which actor/actress would play you?

COURTNEY COX A LA MONICA ON FRIENDS BECAUSE THAT CHARACTER IS TOTALLY ME!

What are five things you’d like to do before you die?

VISIT IRAN, ATTEND BOTH MY DAUGHTERS WEDDINGS, MEET THEIR FUTURE CHILDREN, ATTEND MY SISTERS WEDDING, MEET HER FUTURE CHILDREN

The world would be a better place if…

EVERYONE REALIZED THAT IRAN ISN’T FILLED WITH SAND AND CAMELS. AND THAT MOST PERSIANS AREN’T CRAZY.

What is your opinion of Oprah?

I LOVE HER. I THINK SHE’S SMART AND BEAUTIFUL. I WOULD LOVE TO MEET HER AND CONGRATULATE HER ON BEING SUCH AN INSPIRATION TO SO MANY PEOPLE.

Do you dance?

ONLY WHEN VERY DRUNK OR TRYING TO MAKE MY GIRLS LAUGH.

What is one product that you think lives up to its claims?

NIVEA BODY LOTION. MAKES MY SKIN OH SO SOFT WITHOUT THE PARABENS!

What is the most beautiful place you’ve ever been?

KAUI, HAWAII

What is the most interesting thing about you?

THAT I’M EXTREMELY CLOSE TO MY PARENTS AND SISTER. WE LEFT IRAN DURING THE IRAN/IRAQ WAR WHEN I WAS JUST 8 YEARS OLD. WE SURVIVED THE DAILY BOMBINGS AND MADE A LIFE HERE BY STICKING TOGETHER. WE HAVE BEEN THROUGH A LOT AND I LOVE THEM SOOO MUCH!

Do you ski?

NOPE. I TRIED IT TWICE AND I JUST CAN’T GET MY BODY TO DO WHAT IT SHOULD.

Describe yourself in five words.

PASSIONATE, CARING, FUNNY, ETERNALLY LOYAL

Change, evolve, grow, move forward! Tell ‘em all to piss off! You are the master of your own destiny, so get out there and master it!

Only $16!

Yeah, I like doing these 10 Things lists.  They are just perfect for my short attention span.

1.  I found this article about 6 Words That Make Your Resume Suck.  And I have all of them on my resume.  I guess a revision is in order.

2.  Can someone tell my  why the HELL the Proactiv Solution commercials are so goddamn loud?  I'll be innocently watching CNN and pondering whether or not I'd rather do Anderson Cooper or Don Lemon, and suddenly…

DO YOU SUFFER FROM ANNOYING BREAKOUTS????

I suffer, it seems, from commercials that have somehow figure out how to broadcast their audio at unnecessarily high decibels.

3.  I read this fascinating article about all the pharmaceutical antibiotics in India's Ganges River. This got me thinking!  (I know, I know)  Maybe we should dump Valium into the aquifers in Israel and Palestine and see if it calms that shit down?  Or how about some Redux into the water supplies of American cities?  Can you see where I'm going with this?  BETTER LIVING THROUGH MODERN MEDICINE, YA'LL!

4.  Scientists change their minds all the time.  Coffee is good for you.  Then it's bad for you.  Eggs are good for you.  Then they are bad for you.  Consider this ad from what looks like the 1970's.  *sigh*  Those were the good old days.

5.  I found this hilarious new blog called Cake Wrecks.  She writes snarkily about shitty cakes that people make and posts pictures of them.  (The cakes, not the people.)

6.  Some woman in California had 8 babies in 5 minutes.  This (and the announcement that Sarah Palin is indeed intending to run for President in 2012) is the final sign of the Apocalypse.  Fasten your seatbelts!

7.  Today's Q Speaks Poll:

8.  I hate to say it, but Rod Blagojevich is just one of those people you instinctively want to smack upside the head. (See: Ben Affleck)

9.  Kinky Lego Porn.

10.  Seriously—does this ever get old?

My greatest inspiration comes from the 10 minutes I get in the shower. I solve world problems, figure out dinner, and have remarkable personal ephipanies while shampooing my hair. Its amazing.

A few months ago, I got out of the shower and saw Merlin the Magician staring back at me in the mirror. He’s back, let me just put it that way, so in honor of Mr. M, I am giving you the BG Card of the Day!

Goddess of Fire (King of Swords) – There is an amazing power within  you, a fire that produces the most creative ideas you’ve ever had. Open yourself up to its light, become one with the flame.

Be. A. Flamer.

Online Surveys & Market Research

1.  The cedar trees are having SEX and making me ILL.  I am no fan of tree porn.  What?  You've never heard of Cedar Fever?

2.  This morning saw THOUSANDS of layoffs from companies like Sprint and Home Depot.  Caterpillar is cutting 20,000 jobs just by itself.  America, we're getting screwed. 

3.  Bunnyglitter wants to know:  Who Would You Rather Do…CNN Anchorstud?

4.  If you are not already sufficiently disturbed this morning, enjoy this music video which will make you feel absolutely filthy:

5.  Are you my friend on Facebook?

6.  Bear Pants:

7.  I can't find my cell phone.

8.  Today's The Q Speaks Poll:

9.  Who would pay $50 for this thing?

10.  Have you ever made your own solar panels?  If so, I want to talk to you.

Obama needs more
Than one week as President
To affect real change.

The Bloggy Giveaways Quarterly Carnival page is live!

Yay Free Stuff!!!

Do you know what its like to be driving through mountains when you’re terrified of heights? Yeah, that sucks. Its kind of like plummeting to your death in an even more painful manner, because you know that you’re stupid for even putting yourself up on that mountain to begin with, yet you have no choice but to move forward or risk being thrown from the mountain by the people behind you.

Oh, and the “Falling Rocks” signs. Yeah, let’s just add avalanche paranoia to one’s driving experience. That’s fun.

So, tweak my nipple and call me Nelly! I’m all galavanted out and ready to get busy gettin’ busy!

Yeah.

I found this link via Twitter when one of my friends sent it out–and it is a must-read for everyone:

What the Richest Men in the World Don't Know
By Barbara Goldsmith
The best way to learn financial ethics is to study the lives of the nine wealthiest financiers of 1923. A quarter century later, they were all either dead, broke, or in prison…

Read full post here…

Two years after launching the most technologically savvy presidential
campaign in history, Obama officials ran smack into the constraints of
the federal bureaucracy yesterday, encountering a jumble of
disconnected phone lines, old computer software, and security
regulations forbidding outside e-mail accounts.

What does that mean in 21st-century terms? No Facebook
to communicate with supporters. No outside e-mail log-ins. No instant
messaging. Hard adjustments for a staff that helped sweep Obama to
power through, among other things, relentless online social networking.

"It is kind of like going from an Xbox to an Atari," Obama spokesman Bill Burton said of his new digs.

Read full article at Washington Post…

PDF FIle:

Download Ny-times-ad-obama-gaza

Photo by Steve Rhodes

So much has been said about the inauguration of President Obama that I don't know if there is anything I can add without being totally cliche.  Yes, I love him and his family.  Yes, I'm proud that they represent our country.  Yes, I'm excited for change and I feel a sense of hope and optimism.  I've noticed people look happier and smile easier this week.  I was inspired by his inaugural address and charmed by his family on that special day.  I welcome President Obama, First Lady Michelle Obama, and their gorgeous children to the White House.

But as I ponder the overnight change in the attitude of America, I also wonder what would have happened if the opposition had won.  What if I woke up Tuesday morning and saw John McCain and Sarah Palin taking the oaths of office?  And I am chilled as I realize just how easily it could have happened. 

That is why I want to remind everyone today about CHOICE…and just how powerful it is.  Because in  an instant, a feeling of elation can change to a feeling of fear.  Knowing that the oppressive politics from which we have just been freed could still be strangling our government.  And that a man who refused to acknowledge the dire condition of the economy even as we spiraled down into the worst financial crisis in history, and a woman who thought Africa was a country would be in sitting in the highest offices in the land if just a few less people cared enough to go out and vote one day last November.

Choice is the catalyst for our collective manifest destiny.  It is the right of all people in a democratic society.  Not only by who we choose to represent us in our government, but by our choices in attitude, courage, self-education, cooperation, goodwill, faith, and honesty.  We are all suffering right now from poor choices in government, finance, and ethics by people at every level of our society.  And as Americans, we cannot point the finger and blame anyone but ourselves.  WE (the people) ARE the government, the law, and the economy.  And WE (the people) must collectively choose to change our behaviors and hold ourselves accountable for the condition of our society.

But perhaps the most disturbing contributing factor to the current state of the U.S. is not choices that were made but the refusal of so many to actually make choices.  That is, apathy.

We MUST be actively engaged in our government if it will survive.  We can no longer cower in our over-mortgaged homes, working 50 hours a week to earn money for gluttonous consumption, leaving the big decisions to politicians, businessmen, and policy makers who are as susceptible to corruption as any other human being alive.  So many of us have had no real reaction when we witnessed the vile desecration of our most sacred ideals;  Enron, Abu Graib, The Patriot Act, the Mortgage Crisis, the mishandling of the Katrina disaster, the blatant lies that led us to an unethical invasion of a foreign country, the willing acceptance of torture as a tool for handling terrorists, the disgusting war profiteering by Halliburton, oil companies, and others.  ALL OF THIS and SO MUCH MORE has weakened our society; and we shook our heads and then tuned in each week to our "reality" TV to try and distract ourselves from what was going on.

America, I urge you.  Do not look away any more.  We must hold our officials, ourselves, and each other accountable and responsible for our country.  WE must BE the government.  Remaining active, attentive, and using the full power of democracy, the law, and our economic choices to keep ourselves moving forward to a future where America fulfills its destiny as a beacon of freedom and light to the world.

Consider your choices, America.  Value them.  Protect them.  Today.  Tomorrow.  And forever. 

Name:

Victoria Ellen Everman

Hometown:

Born in Crawfordsville, Indiana; living in San Francisco, CA; moving back to West Hartford, CT on January 14th, 2009

What is your occupation?:

Freelance writer, model, and environmentalist – thinking about becoming a certified yoga teacher

What professional accomplishment are you most proud of?

Just this month, I received my first magazine feature-length assignment – it will be out in the August 2009 issue of Yoga Journal.

What academic accomplishment are you most proud of?:

Leaving high school early and finishing on my own through a long-distance program.  Traditional educational programs in classrooms usually bore the crap out of me. There was a number of folks worried about my choice, but I was confident it was the right choice and still believe that.

What personal accomplishment are you most proud of?:

Being able to leave the house. It may sound like a small accomplishment, but just 2-3 years ago, I couldn’t even do that. I was diagnosed with clinical depression and social anxiety after nearly 2 years of counseling nearly a decade ago. Though I do take a prescription medication, no pill can solve people’s problems – I had to take my sanity into my own hands and have found deep breathing, yoga, and freelance work to be my
saving grace.

What is your favorite word?:

Balance – we could all use more of it.

What is your least favorite word?:

Moist … it is just strange. There is no way to say it without it sounds obscene (not that being obscene is always bad, haha).

What would you choose as your “last meal”?:

Anything cooked by my mom – being around my family during my last moments is all I can ask for.

What’s your favorite guilty pleasure?:

It used to be pedicures (which I got once a month, no matter how poor I was), but now it is all-natural and vegan desserts – I have a terrible sweet tooth!

Describe your favorite pair of shoes.:

None. I used to own a lot of shoes – you know, being a model you can’t help but be inundated in fashion – but now, I only have 5-6 pairs. My first choice would be to be outside, with my feet in direct contact with the Earth.

When do you feel happiest?:

Spending time with my boyfriend after practicing yoga – I am so very at peace.

Name one book that changed your perception of the world.:

Dr. Seuss’ “One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish” – my mom loves Dr. Seuss and read all of his books to me when I was a kid. Unannounced to me, listening (and later reading) his stories helped to instill my passion for nature, food, and diversity.

If they made a movie of your life, which actor/actress would play you?:

Nicole Kidman, probably – I’m not the biggest fan of her work, but thousands of people say I look a bit like her. Knowing how well she likes to research her roles, I bet she could pull off my mental breakdown 8 years ago with great accuracy.

What would you like to do before you die?:

1) Go on a volunteer vacation

2) Visit Sweden

3) Visit France

4) Write a book

The world would be a better place if…:

There were no -isms

What is your opinion of Oprah?:

She’s great, but I’d love to see her do even more for the environment. She is truly the most well-known African American woman alive today and, most of the time, she uses that position for many good things.

Do you dance?:

Of course! I spent 3-4 years studying dance and can’t help but move my hips with I hear music. Now-a-days, the only place that I dance is around my apartment since I’m not into clubs. My boyfriend doesn’t dance unless he has a few drinks in him, but he is good, though he doesn’t believe me no matter how much I tell him.

What is one product that you think lives up to its claims?:

Desert Essence’s Blemish Touch Stick – I know it is something small and seems insignificant, but it is has changed my skin!

What is the most beautiful place you’ve ever been?:

Ohhhh, tough one. Vienna, Austria is beyond gorgeous and I’d live there in a heartbeat.

What is the most interesting thing about you?:

You’re asking the wrong person about that, haha! Probably my drive – I’ve failed countless times and while it does derail me for a bit, I get right back up and try something else. I still have no idea where it comes from and I don’t even notice it until someone else points it out. Notable failures: architecture, painting, singing, gymnastics, college student, office worker … etc.

Do you ski?:

No, but my boyfriend loves snowboarding, which I will be trying for the first time in 2009.

Describe yourself in five words.:

Creative, centered, curious, flexible, driven

Victoria Everman :: Sustainable, Creative, Enlightened Living
http://victoria-e.com/
San Francisco/Connecticut